Loner's Odysseys

Professional Inventor

I told my family about this, they smiled and humored me, but I am still high on excitement, so I'll tell you too.

I have been considering ways to capture video while snowboarding without damaging myself or my devices. I had a dream the night before going to Dodge Ridge that involved a tube sock.

Tube socks and duct tape can essentially solve any modern problem, so I went with it.

What you need:

1. Sock
2. Scissors
3. Duct tape
4. Cool Dad to make you a delicious breakfast burrito

Process:

1. eat the breakfast burrito
2. dissolve any emotional attachment you have to the sock
3. clip a small piece of duct tape, about 1.5" x 1.5"
4. find the center of the sock (between toe and opening) and place the clipped duct tape over this section
5. pinch a fold of the tape-covered sock and cut a half-circle to make a hole about the size of your camera's lens
6. turn camera to the video setting and slip it in to the sock, positioning the lens to come out of the hole you cut
7. tie the sock around your shin
8. start the video

Testing.

Does that goose perspective look clear and about shin level to you?

Me too...we are in business.

Implemented only on the bunny hill. It was a snowy day and my shin was in the snow on most other runs.

Added Cake because it is boring.

Snow Sock Cam from Scott Bolter on Vimeo.

Problems:

1. requires a waterproof camera
2. tube sock knot could easily come out and fall off while heading down the slope
3. people look at you funny
4. even on a less than stormy day the camera lens is likely to catch snow from carving, obstructing the view
5. cameras often have no outside indicator telling you that video-record mode has been started so you don't know if you pressed the button (through the sock) correctly
6. if you use this invention, you will be nicknamed "Captain Jenky" by your friends, family, and strangers
7. my camera is not meant for taking videos

Sand or snow, still true:

Day's Discourse

• To the 7-toothed limping pregnant lady smoking a cigarette at the gas station: Don't do that. Don't you realize you're pretty much limiting your kid to being a snow shoveler at some ski resort?
• To the Subaru in front of me: I love to hate or I hate to love you, I can't decide...but my hick-mobile certainly envies your WRX and STI-ness
• To Sonora's WAL-MART: Thanks for welcoming in to your bosom all of those people, helping to keep the interwebs hilarious.
• To the Cadillac Escalade Hybrid owner pulling in to the Arco gas station: Who the hell are you kidding?
• To the snow starting to hit my windshield at increased speeds: Chewy, lock in the hyperdrive! Light speed!
• To the CHP officer: Did you give my buddy Casey a bull shit fix-it ticket? No? Then yes, I am carrying chains, carry on.
• To the Subaru crashed in to the snow bank: ha ha.
• To the snow shoveler with dreadlocks and pessimistic countenance: I'm sorry buddy. I bet your mom smoked while she was pregnant with you and also had few teeth and also didn't love you when she limped around at gas stations. It's not your fault.
• To the chair lift operator: Yes, that is a hidden camera on my shin inside a sock. Yes, the sock is clean. And yes, I am a spy, but we are not after you.
• To the heavy storm and powdered-with-snow mountain: Please don't have an avalanche for the next 100 seconds while I am in this porta potty.

Finally, to my hick-mobile...

Thanks for backing out smoothly and turning around to exit without requiring me to shovel lots of snow and install chains like the folks all around us.
Let's never fight again.

Conclusions

Happy Birthday Mom!!!